But usually I have plenty to say.
With Attila, I would just like to say Gerard Butler is hot. Really hot. That is all.
Okay, fine, I'll tell you about the movie. I caught it on late-night cable once and couldn't stop watching, even though it's about Huns and Romans and wars and normally that sort of thing bores me to tears. But then, I used to be bored by operas, too. But not anymore. Luvya, Gerry.
Attila is the story of the infamous Hun who had the spirit and the drive to rule the world. Or, at the very least, rule Europe. Back in Attila's day, the Romans ruled it, and those Romans -- Attila doesn't like them. They're deceitful and backstabbing, and he's more of a Hi, allow me to simply run my sword through the front of you kind of guy.
The story starts out when Attila is just a boy. He witnesses his family being slaughtered, but not before his father tells him about a prophecy that someday a man will become king of the Huns and help them conquer the world. Attila somehow just knows he's the guy for the job, except to be that guy, you have to find this magical sword, and he hasn't yet found that. But... hey, technicality. After his family dies, young Attila manages to escape, and is later found by his uncle (also a Hun, naturally) and goes to live with that group.
As an adult, Attila leads attacks on some villages, trying to take more land and get more slaves and all that stuff. During one of his raids, he is nearly killed by a fiery-haired beauty named N'Kara. He spares her life, and then falls for her. But Attila's older brother, Bleda (who already lived with this other group of Huns, long story), finds out Attila likes N'Kara and claims N'Kara for himself.
Meanwhile, in Rome, the Romans are freaking out because they've heard that the Huns are getting closer and closer. They've heard about this wild and crazy Attila guy who has taken down so many villages. They decide to befriend Attila, rather than fight him, hoping that he will never turn on them.
Attila is an epic movie, clocking in at about three hours. Originally a cable miniseries, it mostly covers the adult life of our main character. We learn how he and the Romans got together and all the craziness that went on in Rome. We hear how he challenged his brother to a duel, won, married N'Kara, lost N'Kara, and found the sword. Once he's got the sword, nations all succumb to him. But Attila never forgets his love for N'Kara, despite having a plethora of wives.
And in the end -- tragedy. Terrible tragedy. Poor Attila.
It's a long movie with a lot of gore, but it's also fascinating. I've heard there are a few historical inaccuracies, but apparently the filmmakers got a lot right. The battle scenes are worthy of anything you'd see in a movie for the big screen. The drama and the angst are the icing on the cake.
Or you could just watch it for the same reason I watch it.
Attila is available on DVD.
